Transitioning
This past week has been hard on Reed, and I'm a little afraid of what that will mean for our summer. Disregulation has become a way of life for my little man, stemming from many sources. First, it's Spring Break. There is no Kindergarten. Despite my best efforts to follow his classroom schedule, it's just not the same. Next on the list of culprits is the rescheduling of his visit to my grandparents. My grandparents love having him over, and were so excited to spend a few days of his spring break with him. Then, early Easter morning, my grandfather went into the hospital (he's recently had surgery and developed a blood clot in his leg). No Papa= No Reed visit. He took it well, but I know he was disappointed, and it is contributing to his unrest this week. Then, we got a new roof. It was loud, it was unfamiliar, and he couldn't even go out into the yard on some of the nicest days we've had this year. That was the final straw. He disintegrated, and hasn't been the same since. Meltdown after meltdown have disrupted my day, the most recent of which involved kicking his little brother in the head because Owen was climbing onto his bed without removing his sandals first.The solution to all this chaos would be to leave the house, but with gas prices as high as they are now, I can't afford to drive anywhere if it's not absolutely necessary. We were going to take a walk, but since Reed insisted on the longest possible lunch today, there wasn't time before Owen's nap.
I know I seem to complain a lot, but please don't get me wrong. I'm merely frustrated because I am so new to this autism-parenting. I don't know how to help him cope with his noisy, unpredictable life. I feel woefully unqualified to be the mom to this amazing little kid. I'm just looking for a little validation that even if he has a kicking, screaming, thrashing fit every day this week, that we're still making progress. He has moved into the "I hate this" phase, which while somewhat infuriating, really feels great (as long as it's not me he hates). He is learning to verbalize his frustrations. The chair is in his way? I'll take "I hate this chair!" over throwing the chair through a window any day.
posted by Steph at
2:43 PM
1 comment(s):
Steph, here is validation! We have had many days and weeks like this, and they have all passed. You will get through it. I promise.
It's wise to start thinking about summer now. I have found that Bud is able to manage the changes in schedule best when I can keep his life as structured and predictable as possible. He doesn't need sameness (the same thing the same way every day), but he does need to know what comes next. He does well when I give him a preview at bedtime of what's coming the next day. Also, visual schedules have been ENORMOUSLY helpful in making his days seem predictable and giving him some sense of control. It really helps Bud when he can SEE it, and not just hear it.
By
Mary, at
8:05 PM
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